crack pairing meme
Aug. 30th, 2010 09:38 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
anghraineI stumbled across this and wasted a very happy hour with it.
Pride and Prejudice
(1) Elizabeth Bennet
(2) Fitzwilliam Darcy
(3) Jane Bennet
(4) Lydia Bennet
(5) George Wickham
(6) Charlotte Lucas
(7) Colonel Fitzwilliam
(8) Lady Catherine de Bourgh
(9) Mr Bennet
(10) Georgiana Darcy
(11) Mrs Gardiner
(12) William Collins
(1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
Charlotte/Mrs Gardiner:
I think I would have remembered if I had. I’d totally read it (Charlotte femmeslash!), though I’d really prefer a non-adulterous version. No, I don’t know how that would work.
(2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Lydia:
Uh ... I guess? I mean, presumably she must be, but – er, I never gave it much thought. Ew.
(3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
If Mr Collins got Lady Catherine pregnant:
...
I would die of the lulz.
Honestly, I can totally see him being, uh, interested, and maybe if she married very young it might be physiologically possible, but ...
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
I guess she’d go off to some remote cottage for her health and I don’t even know but can you imagine the look on Elizabeth’s face? The look on Darcy’s face?
*iz ded*
(4) Can you rec any fic(s) about Nine?
Mr Bennet:
Hm. I didn’t always agree with it, but Joanie’s Feeling A Bit Missish is at least interesting. And well-cited.
(5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Charlotte/Darcy:
Quite possibly, if you overlook the pesky attraction business. I don’t see Darcy as attracted to introverts, and Charlotte’s definitely not attracted to men. Now, with girl!Darcy ... heh. It could be epic.
(6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
Wickham/Mr Bennet or Wickham/Georgiana:
O_o
The obvious answer is Wickham/Georgiana, since that’s sort of canonical, but honestly, Wickham/Mr Bennet seems marginally less dysfunctional and manipulative and utterly horrifying. And according to Elizabeth, Wickham did schmooze his way into Mr Bennet’s good graces, so – maybe?
Uh, pre-Lydiagate.
(7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
If Colonel Fitzwilliam walked in on Darcy and Collins:
Uh, he'd probably scream, or run away, or vomit into a bush, or any combination of the three. Presumably he’d also help Darcy kick the laudanum habit.
(8) Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
Jane/Georgiana:
Not long after Bingley’s death in a tragic accident involving a pickaxe, a quill, and a TARDIS, a chance meeting brings Elizabeth and Darcy together. While they pick their way through an awkward courtship, Jane takes Georgiana Darcy under her wing.
(9) Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Elizabeth/Lady Catherine fluff:
Uh, that’d be a resounding NO.
(10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
Fitzwilliam/Collins:
Er, going with war-damaged!Fitzwilliam and unmarried!Collins (my brain is breaking here), er ...
Pro patria mori. *iz original*
(11) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One?
Lydia deflowering Elizabeth:
Well, duh.
Aliens.
(12) Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?
Colonel Fitzwilliam slash:
I’m sure many of them would if they could, but it pretty much doesn’t exist. There are maybe a dozen slash fics in the fandom, and they all seem to be Darcy/Bingley or Darcy/Wickham.
(Darcy/Fitzwilliam, incidentally, is the only Darcy slash that I can remotely wrap my brain around.)
(13) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
Jane het:
Yes! Some of them even write it.
(14) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
Mrs Gardiner:
I’m pretty sure I’m the only one, actually.
(15) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Darcy/Lydia/Wickham:
... Lord, I hope not.
(16) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
Georgiana:
Probably please and thank you.
(17) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, which song would you choose?
Lady Catherine
Reflection. Yes, from Mulan. It makes sense if you think about it.
(If daughters are never of much consequence to their fathers, presumably young Lady Catherine Fitzwilliam wasn’t either.)
(18) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warnings be?
Elizabeth/Charlotte/Collins:
*blinks*
Adultery and crack.
(19) What might be a good pick-up line for Two to use on Ten?
Darcy on Georgiana:
DO NOT WANT.
In some alternate universe where she’s not his baby sister and ward – his cousin, say – it would probably be something like, “I have been given to understand that you are no longer consigned to the schoolroom.”
(20) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Wickham:
I don’t exactly seek it out, so probably about a year.
Profanation, of course.
(21) What is Six's super-sekrit kink?
Charlotte:
Authoritative women.
(22) Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?
Mrs Gardiner and Mr Bennet:
No. Quite aside from adultery and quasi-incest, I’m not sure the young stylish Mrs Gardiner of canon could get past his powdering gown.
(23) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
Jane and Fitzwilliam:
This should be cracky, but it’s randomly popular in the fandom even though they never meet in canon.
I expect they’d, uh, switch it up a bit.
(24) “One and Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Three." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.
So:
Elizabeth and Mr Bennet are in a happy relationship until Mr Bennet suddenly runs off with Lydia. Elizabeth, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Mrs Gardiner and a brief unhappy affair with Mr Collins, then follows the wise advice of George Wickham and finds true love with Jane.
Title: Dysfunction Junction.
I doubt anybody would read this. And nobody should ever write it.
(25) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
Colonel Fitzwilliam/Lady Catherine:
OMG TEH SQUICK
Lord of the Rings
(1) Faramir
(2) Denethor
(3) Gandalf
(4) Aragorn
(5) Finduilas
(6) Pippin
(7) Éowyn
(8) Frodo
(9) Lothíriel
(10) Ioreth
(11) Gollum
(12) Beregond
(1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
Pippin/Gollum:
There is not enough no in the world.
(2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Aragorn:
Depends. Apparently Strider!Aragorn doesn't exactly look fair, so I'm imagining not, while Kingly!Aragorn does, so probably. Thorongil, definitely.
(3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
If Beregond got Frodo pregnant:
I would try to stab my eyeballs out.
(4) Can you rec any fic(s) about Nine?
About Lothíriel:
Yes! Lilan's In the Darkness of the Day is excellent.
(5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Denethor and Pippin:
...
O_o
I have nothing further to say.
(6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
Finduilas/Lothíriel or Finduilas/Ioreth:
Choices, choices.
Finduilas/Ioreth, ’cause Ioreth isn’t her niece. And presumably they might actually have been alive at the same time.
(7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
If Éowyn walked in on Denethor and Beregond:
It’s truly a marker of this meme’s craziness that this one seems halfway reasonable. I presume she would walk away and try not to think about it.
(8) Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
Gandalf/Ioreth:
Gandalf recognises his friend Alatar in the form of an elderly wise-woman.
(This would make her 'sister' Pallando, I guess.)
(9) Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Faramir/Frodo:
Yes. Quite a lot, in fact.
(10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
Éowyn/Beregond:
The Faithful
(11) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One?
If I wanted Aragorn to deflower Faramir:
*shudder*
I don’t know, except that it would involve Speshul Númenórean Powerz.
(12) Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?
Éowyn slash:
I don’t know.
(13) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
Gandalf het:
LOLZ no. Er, I think.
(14) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
Gollum:
I don’t know. Probably one of them has at some point.
(15) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Denethor/Aragorn/Finduilas:
I should think not, though I expect there’s quite a lot of it somewhere. (I ... don't particularly care for Aragorn/Finduilas, though I suppose it's not quite as far out there as many fan pairings. They could conceivably have met.)
(16) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
Ioreth:
I seriously have no idea.
(17) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, which song would you choose?
Frodo:
Come Sail Away, Styx
(18) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warnings be?
Faramir/Pippin/Beregond? Uh ... interspecies threesome across boundaries of authority.
(19) What might be a good pick-up line for Two to use on Ten?
Denethor on Ioreth:
Nothing.
(20) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Finduilas:
Two weeks ago.
(21) What is Six's super-sekrit kink?
Pippin:
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW.
(It's strange how it's so much more disturbing for Middle-earth than Austen.)
(22) Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?
Gollum and Lothíriel:
No, no, no, never.
(23) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
Gandalf and Éowyn:
guuuuuh.
also, Éowyn.
(24) “One and Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Three." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.
So:
Faramir and Lothíriel are in a happy relationship until Lothíriel suddenly runs off with Aragorn. Faramir, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Gollum and a brief unhappy affair with Beregond, then follows the wise advice of Finduilas and finds true love with Gandalf.
Title: No Boundaries
readers: I devoutly hope none of you would
writer: whoever is best at crack, I guess
(25) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
Éowyn/Frodo:
Very confused.
Star Wars
(1) Padmé Amidala
(2) Leia Organa
(3) Lando Calrissian
(4) Han Solo
(5) Anakin Skywalker
(6) Luke Skywalker
(7) Mon Mothma
(8) Sabé
(9) Shmi Skywalker
(10) Obi-Wan Kenobi
(11) Yoda
(12) Qui-Gon Jinn
(1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
Luke/Yoda:
No, and ZOMG NO. I not only don't want to read it, I don't want it to ever happen.
(2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Han Solo:
Hell, yes.
(3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
If Qui-Gon Jinn got Sabé pregnant:
Yikes. What is she, twelve?
Anyway, Padmé and the other handmaidens would help her conceal the pregnancy, and hide her away for the last few months. Thanks to the decoying, if there were any rumours, they'd be about Padmé. The baby, presuming it was Force-sensitive, would be taken to the Temple, she'd go back to handmaidening, and Qui-Gon would be in serious trouble with the Council. As well he ought.
(4) Can you rec any fic(s) about Nine?
Shmi Skywalker:
Yes! Fialleril's Chosen is my absolute favourite.
(5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Leia/Luke:
Heh. I don't really want to go there, but ignoring the retcon of pointlessness ... perhaps. Theoretically. There's no doubt that they love each other, they seem to be good influences on each other, happier when they're together and all that. I just don't see it happening – partly because Leia seems very maternal with Luke, and partly because they don't really seem interested. Leia's like “I'll show you, Han Solo” and Luke's like “a girl kissed me. Instead of Han. ahahahahaha.”
They would make the best Straight Will and Grace ever, though.
(6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
Anakin/Shmi or Anakin/Obi-Wan:
While I loathe master/apprentice pairings, they're marginally less horrifying than parental incest. So Anakin/Obi-Wan. I guess.
(7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
If Mon walked in on Leia and Qui-Gon:
She would be very surprised.
(8) Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
Lando/Obi-Wan:
Lando discovers that the voice in his head isn't a sign of impending madness.
(9) Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Padmé/Sabé fluff:
I haven't personally read it, but I'm sure it exists. It's got to hit twin kinks, or something.
(10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
Mon Mothma/Qui-Gon H/C fic:
Sedition
(11) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One?
If I wanted Han to deflower Padmé, I would use:
Time travel.
(12) Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?
Mon Mothma slash:
LOL, not that I'm aware of.
(13) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
Lando het:
Again, not that I'm aware of.
(14) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
Yoda:
That would be awesome. But I don't think so.
(15) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Leia/Han/Anakin:
I don't know, but I certainly hope not. I'd feel compelled to read any SW fic on my f-list, and then I would be scarred for life.
(16) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
Obi-Wan:
I honestly don't know. It's hard to imagine him having a moment of great passion.
(17) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, which song would you choose?
Sabé:
Because of You, Kelly Clarkson
(18) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warnings be?
Padmé/Luke/Qui-Gon:
Incest, ghosts.
(19) What might be a good pick-up line for Two to use on Ten?
Leia and Obi-Wan:
...
Good work.
(20) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Anakin Skywalker:
Yesterday.
(21) What is Six's super-sekrit kink?
Luke:
Uh. I really don't know. I don't want to know. *grabs the brain bleach*
(22) Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?
Yoda would not shag Shmi Skywalker. Ever.
(23) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
If Landa and Mon get together:
Mon.
(24) “One and Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Three." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.
So:
Padmé Amidala and Shmi Skywalker are in a happy relationship until Shmi suddenly runs off with Han Solo. (OMG, he's Anakin's father! It all makes sense now! Obviously this is in my happy lalaland where Luke and Leia are maternal half-siblings, so Han's not his wife's grandfather. OTOH, he is Luke's. Ha!) Padmé, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Yoda (!) and a brief unhappy affair with Qui-Gon Jinn, then follows the wise advice of Anakin Skywalker (!!!!!) and finds true love with Lando.
...
Title: Operation Insanity
I do not know of one person on my f-list who would read this. Nobody should write it, except maybe the part where Anakin advises Padmé to find true love with Lando. That would be hilarious.
(25) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
Mon/Sabé:
Indifferent.
Pride and Prejudice
(1) Elizabeth Bennet
(2) Fitzwilliam Darcy
(3) Jane Bennet
(4) Lydia Bennet
(5) George Wickham
(6) Charlotte Lucas
(7) Colonel Fitzwilliam
(8) Lady Catherine de Bourgh
(9) Mr Bennet
(10) Georgiana Darcy
(11) Mrs Gardiner
(12) William Collins
(1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
Charlotte/Mrs Gardiner:
I think I would have remembered if I had. I’d totally read it (Charlotte femmeslash!), though I’d really prefer a non-adulterous version. No, I don’t know how that would work.
(2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Lydia:
Uh ... I guess? I mean, presumably she must be, but – er, I never gave it much thought. Ew.
(3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
If Mr Collins got Lady Catherine pregnant:
...
I would die of the lulz.
Honestly, I can totally see him being, uh, interested, and maybe if she married very young it might be physiologically possible, but ...
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
I guess she’d go off to some remote cottage for her health and I don’t even know but can you imagine the look on Elizabeth’s face? The look on Darcy’s face?
*iz ded*
(4) Can you rec any fic(s) about Nine?
Mr Bennet:
Hm. I didn’t always agree with it, but Joanie’s Feeling A Bit Missish is at least interesting. And well-cited.
(5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Charlotte/Darcy:
Quite possibly, if you overlook the pesky attraction business. I don’t see Darcy as attracted to introverts, and Charlotte’s definitely not attracted to men. Now, with girl!Darcy ... heh. It could be epic.
(6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
Wickham/Mr Bennet or Wickham/Georgiana:
O_o
The obvious answer is Wickham/Georgiana, since that’s sort of canonical, but honestly, Wickham/Mr Bennet seems marginally less dysfunctional and manipulative and utterly horrifying. And according to Elizabeth, Wickham did schmooze his way into Mr Bennet’s good graces, so – maybe?
Uh, pre-Lydiagate.
(7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
If Colonel Fitzwilliam walked in on Darcy and Collins:
Uh, he'd probably scream, or run away, or vomit into a bush, or any combination of the three. Presumably he’d also help Darcy kick the laudanum habit.
(8) Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
Jane/Georgiana:
Not long after Bingley’s death in a tragic accident involving a pickaxe, a quill, and a TARDIS, a chance meeting brings Elizabeth and Darcy together. While they pick their way through an awkward courtship, Jane takes Georgiana Darcy under her wing.
(9) Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Elizabeth/Lady Catherine fluff:
Uh, that’d be a resounding NO.
(10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
Fitzwilliam/Collins:
Er, going with war-damaged!Fitzwilliam and unmarried!Collins (my brain is breaking here), er ...
Pro patria mori. *iz original*
(11) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One?
Lydia deflowering Elizabeth:
Well, duh.
Aliens.
(12) Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?
Colonel Fitzwilliam slash:
I’m sure many of them would if they could, but it pretty much doesn’t exist. There are maybe a dozen slash fics in the fandom, and they all seem to be Darcy/Bingley or Darcy/Wickham.
(Darcy/Fitzwilliam, incidentally, is the only Darcy slash that I can remotely wrap my brain around.)
(13) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
Jane het:
Yes! Some of them even write it.
(14) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
Mrs Gardiner:
I’m pretty sure I’m the only one, actually.
(15) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Darcy/Lydia/Wickham:
... Lord, I hope not.
(16) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
Georgiana:
Probably please and thank you.
(17) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, which song would you choose?
Lady Catherine
Reflection. Yes, from Mulan. It makes sense if you think about it.
(If daughters are never of much consequence to their fathers, presumably young Lady Catherine Fitzwilliam wasn’t either.)
(18) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warnings be?
Elizabeth/Charlotte/Collins:
*blinks*
Adultery and crack.
(19) What might be a good pick-up line for Two to use on Ten?
Darcy on Georgiana:
DO NOT WANT.
In some alternate universe where she’s not his baby sister and ward – his cousin, say – it would probably be something like, “I have been given to understand that you are no longer consigned to the schoolroom.”
(20) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Wickham:
I don’t exactly seek it out, so probably about a year.
Profanation, of course.
(21) What is Six's super-sekrit kink?
Charlotte:
Authoritative women.
(22) Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?
Mrs Gardiner and Mr Bennet:
No. Quite aside from adultery and quasi-incest, I’m not sure the young stylish Mrs Gardiner of canon could get past his powdering gown.
(23) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
Jane and Fitzwilliam:
This should be cracky, but it’s randomly popular in the fandom even though they never meet in canon.
I expect they’d, uh, switch it up a bit.
(24) “One and Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Three." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.
So:
Elizabeth and Mr Bennet are in a happy relationship until Mr Bennet suddenly runs off with Lydia. Elizabeth, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Mrs Gardiner and a brief unhappy affair with Mr Collins, then follows the wise advice of George Wickham and finds true love with Jane.
Title: Dysfunction Junction.
I doubt anybody would read this. And nobody should ever write it.
(25) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
Colonel Fitzwilliam/Lady Catherine:
OMG TEH SQUICK
Lord of the Rings
(1) Faramir
(2) Denethor
(3) Gandalf
(4) Aragorn
(5) Finduilas
(6) Pippin
(7) Éowyn
(8) Frodo
(9) Lothíriel
(10) Ioreth
(11) Gollum
(12) Beregond
(1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
Pippin/Gollum:
There is not enough no in the world.
(2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Aragorn:
Depends. Apparently Strider!Aragorn doesn't exactly look fair, so I'm imagining not, while Kingly!Aragorn does, so probably. Thorongil, definitely.
(3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
If Beregond got Frodo pregnant:
I would try to stab my eyeballs out.
(4) Can you rec any fic(s) about Nine?
About Lothíriel:
Yes! Lilan's In the Darkness of the Day is excellent.
(5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Denethor and Pippin:
...
O_o
I have nothing further to say.
(6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
Finduilas/Lothíriel or Finduilas/Ioreth:
Choices, choices.
Finduilas/Ioreth, ’cause Ioreth isn’t her niece. And presumably they might actually have been alive at the same time.
(7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
If Éowyn walked in on Denethor and Beregond:
It’s truly a marker of this meme’s craziness that this one seems halfway reasonable. I presume she would walk away and try not to think about it.
(8) Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
Gandalf/Ioreth:
Gandalf recognises his friend Alatar in the form of an elderly wise-woman.
(This would make her 'sister' Pallando, I guess.)
(9) Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Faramir/Frodo:
Yes. Quite a lot, in fact.
(10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
Éowyn/Beregond:
The Faithful
(11) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One?
If I wanted Aragorn to deflower Faramir:
*shudder*
I don’t know, except that it would involve Speshul Númenórean Powerz.
(12) Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?
Éowyn slash:
I don’t know.
(13) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
Gandalf het:
LOLZ no. Er, I think.
(14) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
Gollum:
I don’t know. Probably one of them has at some point.
(15) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Denethor/Aragorn/Finduilas:
I should think not, though I expect there’s quite a lot of it somewhere. (I ... don't particularly care for Aragorn/Finduilas, though I suppose it's not quite as far out there as many fan pairings. They could conceivably have met.)
(16) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
Ioreth:
I seriously have no idea.
(17) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, which song would you choose?
Frodo:
Come Sail Away, Styx
(18) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warnings be?
Faramir/Pippin/Beregond? Uh ... interspecies threesome across boundaries of authority.
(19) What might be a good pick-up line for Two to use on Ten?
Denethor on Ioreth:
Nothing.
(20) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Finduilas:
Two weeks ago.
(21) What is Six's super-sekrit kink?
Pippin:
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW.
(It's strange how it's so much more disturbing for Middle-earth than Austen.)
(22) Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?
Gollum and Lothíriel:
No, no, no, never.
(23) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
Gandalf and Éowyn:
guuuuuh.
also, Éowyn.
(24) “One and Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Three." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.
So:
Faramir and Lothíriel are in a happy relationship until Lothíriel suddenly runs off with Aragorn. Faramir, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Gollum and a brief unhappy affair with Beregond, then follows the wise advice of Finduilas and finds true love with Gandalf.
Title: No Boundaries
readers: I devoutly hope none of you would
writer: whoever is best at crack, I guess
(25) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
Éowyn/Frodo:
Very confused.
Star Wars
(1) Padmé Amidala
(2) Leia Organa
(3) Lando Calrissian
(4) Han Solo
(5) Anakin Skywalker
(6) Luke Skywalker
(7) Mon Mothma
(8) Sabé
(9) Shmi Skywalker
(10) Obi-Wan Kenobi
(11) Yoda
(12) Qui-Gon Jinn
(1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
Luke/Yoda:
No, and ZOMG NO. I not only don't want to read it, I don't want it to ever happen.
(2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Han Solo:
Hell, yes.
(3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
If Qui-Gon Jinn got Sabé pregnant:
Yikes. What is she, twelve?
Anyway, Padmé and the other handmaidens would help her conceal the pregnancy, and hide her away for the last few months. Thanks to the decoying, if there were any rumours, they'd be about Padmé. The baby, presuming it was Force-sensitive, would be taken to the Temple, she'd go back to handmaidening, and Qui-Gon would be in serious trouble with the Council. As well he ought.
(4) Can you rec any fic(s) about Nine?
Shmi Skywalker:
Yes! Fialleril's Chosen is my absolute favourite.
(5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Leia/Luke:
Heh. I don't really want to go there, but ignoring the retcon of pointlessness ... perhaps. Theoretically. There's no doubt that they love each other, they seem to be good influences on each other, happier when they're together and all that. I just don't see it happening – partly because Leia seems very maternal with Luke, and partly because they don't really seem interested. Leia's like “I'll show you, Han Solo” and Luke's like “a girl kissed me. Instead of Han. ahahahahaha.”
They would make the best Straight Will and Grace ever, though.
(6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
Anakin/Shmi or Anakin/Obi-Wan:
While I loathe master/apprentice pairings, they're marginally less horrifying than parental incest. So Anakin/Obi-Wan. I guess.
(7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
If Mon walked in on Leia and Qui-Gon:
She would be very surprised.
(8) Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
Lando/Obi-Wan:
Lando discovers that the voice in his head isn't a sign of impending madness.
(9) Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Padmé/Sabé fluff:
I haven't personally read it, but I'm sure it exists. It's got to hit twin kinks, or something.
(10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
Mon Mothma/Qui-Gon H/C fic:
Sedition
(11) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One?
If I wanted Han to deflower Padmé, I would use:
Time travel.
(12) Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?
Mon Mothma slash:
LOL, not that I'm aware of.
(13) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
Lando het:
Again, not that I'm aware of.
(14) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
Yoda:
That would be awesome. But I don't think so.
(15) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Leia/Han/Anakin:
I don't know, but I certainly hope not. I'd feel compelled to read any SW fic on my f-list, and then I would be scarred for life.
(16) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
Obi-Wan:
I honestly don't know. It's hard to imagine him having a moment of great passion.
(17) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, which song would you choose?
Sabé:
Because of You, Kelly Clarkson
(18) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warnings be?
Padmé/Luke/Qui-Gon:
Incest, ghosts.
(19) What might be a good pick-up line for Two to use on Ten?
Leia and Obi-Wan:
...
Good work.
(20) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Anakin Skywalker:
Yesterday.
(21) What is Six's super-sekrit kink?
Luke:
Uh. I really don't know. I don't want to know. *grabs the brain bleach*
(22) Would Eleven shag Nine? Drunk or sober?
Yoda would not shag Shmi Skywalker. Ever.
(23) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
If Landa and Mon get together:
Mon.
(24) “One and Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Three." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.
So:
Padmé Amidala and Shmi Skywalker are in a happy relationship until Shmi suddenly runs off with Han Solo. (OMG, he's Anakin's father! It all makes sense now! Obviously this is in my happy lalaland where Luke and Leia are maternal half-siblings, so Han's not his wife's grandfather. OTOH, he is Luke's. Ha!) Padmé, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with Yoda (!) and a brief unhappy affair with Qui-Gon Jinn, then follows the wise advice of Anakin Skywalker (!!!!!) and finds true love with Lando.
...
Title: Operation Insanity
I do not know of one person on my f-list who would read this. Nobody should write it, except maybe the part where Anakin advises Padmé to find true love with Lando. That would be hilarious.
(25) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
Mon/Sabé:
Indifferent.
no subject
on 2010-08-31 03:54 am (UTC)Mrs G is a fairly young wife, yes? Pretend that Mr & Mrs G have only been married for ten years, then have the Charlotte/Future Mrs Gardiner happen when Charlotte is sixteen :D
Charlotte/Darcy:
I kinda sorta really want to see it done somehow. Because even though it wouldn't be a lovematch, I think it could work as a friendship thing. Also, Charlotte/girl!Darcy would totally be epic.
Elizabeth/Lady Catherine fluff:
... now I want Elizabeth/Lady Catherine to exist, if only for the lulz. (And perhaps only in Lady Catherine's sapphic pre-Lydiagate daydreams. Hee.)
Lydia deflowering Elizabeth:
YOU KNOW, I THINK WICKHAM WRITES PORN ABOUT THIS IN HIS SPARE TIME.
Colonel Fitzwilliam slash:
I want to slash him with Tom Bertram someday.
no subject
on 2010-08-31 05:26 am (UTC)I would love Charlotte/Darcy in pretty much anything. (I've always liked the idea (though of course FI made me want it like whoa.)
Ly C fantasizing about E? Heeeeh.
I suspect Wickham actually writes Lydia/Georgiana porn, but hey, you never know.
Tom/Fitzwilliam? Huh, could work. I wouldn't have ever thought of it, though I could see it. Especially from Tom's side of things.
no subject
on 2010-08-31 05:56 am (UTC)Oh yeah, that's true. (I forgot that bit. I think I've only read the book twice yet?)
I would love Charlotte/Darcy in pretty much anything. (I've always liked the idea (though of course FI made me want it like whoa.)
It has potential for good stuff, yes! Not sure how to get the ball rolling for the non-genderswapped version, though. (Maybe some sort of Forced Marriage Scenario type thing where Charlotte's reputation is accidentally compromised?)
Tom/Fitzwilliam? Huh, could work. I wouldn't have ever thought of it, though I could see it. Especially from Tom's side of things.
I've been trying to figure out who to slash Tom Bertram with ever since I started reading MP and eventually I came up with Colonel Fitzwilliam as an option because while he does seem to flirt with ladies, he also doesn't get serious with them. Which he claims is because he needs to marry a girl with a humongous dowry, but if you look at it from the slashy angle he COULD just be using that as an excuse not to get married. Or something.