Tumblr crosspost (10 February 2021)

[anghraine]

It seems ridiculous, but—

I feel sort of accomplished by the fact that I:

• got up at 8 AM
• posted materials for my class
• played a Guild Wars mission with my mother
• drank tea
• ate breakfast
• answered a student email
• posted instructions/announcements for the week in Blackboard
• showered
• brushed some of my hair
• brushed all my teeth
• took my medications (bipolar meds & asthma ones & supplements)
• tried to return a call

There are other things that I not only need to do, but should have finished at absolute latest last week, and meanwhile, my brain is like “okay, but we brushed a mat out of our hair for the first time in six weeks”

Tagged: #even my best friend is like 'but you're so high-functioning' and meanwhile getting my shit together enough for basic hygiene is just #this ordeal #and has always been! #because a) getting my shit together enough to do much of anything is a very steep climb #esp things with more than one part to them #and b) sensation is Bad #except peeling the skin off my lips. which i do for no reason but have never managed to stop. #but nearly everything else is high intensity red alert #ugh #i should be doing more things than this! but a lot of days i don't manage this much so ?????????